Posted by: sternenfeeinflorida | 16 February 2009


Let me say this, my dating strategy is much different than that of most other people. I don’t play games and I certainly don’t believe in the 3-date rule or whatever it may be today. Instead I developed a 3-category rule.

Don’t get me wrong now, I don’t mind just meeting a guy for dinner or a drink and leave it at that for the night. It’s a lot more important to me that I enjoy the company I’m in. If he’s intelligent and has a good sense of humor, it’s almost always a joy to be with him. It just depends on the guy and the circumstances. But it’s always said that having sex on the first date makes a woman “easy”. I say that it’s men who are so easy. Wink at them a little, caress their ego, tell them how attractive they are and you have no problem getting what you want… at least for one night.

Use ‘em and lose ‘em is the first category I use for dating. Go out, have fun but decide that there’s something so fundamentally wrong with him, I have no desire to take it any further.

Moving into the second category, boy toy, is a little more difficult as it involves more work. All of a sudden I have to make sure I stay in touch, keep them interested… and they have to still be interesting to me. Most men don’t understand the difference between a casual relationship and a serious one. They think if a woman is interested in them, she wants a serious relationship, marriage and what not. Men, wake up!! You’re not THAT irresistible in most cases.

The third category is the keeper. He has passed the first two categories with flying colors, is still very interesting and interested, keeps up with me and simply likes me for who I am… I, of course, would have to be doing the same. That’s where most men fail.

I always like to get the important stuff out of the way first. I need to make sure I’m compatible on 5 different important topics:

1. Religion: Glad you like yours but don’t bother me with it. I’m happy the way I am and if I don’t believe in myself, who does?
2. Politics: Don’t tell me you don’t care, don’t vote, and simply aren’t interested. Dig yourself a whole, I’m glad to bury you.
3. Kids: Hate them, hate them, and hate them. No compromise.
4. Sports: I love watching sports. I don’t care if we’re rooting for opposing teams, as long as there’s sports in my life, I’m happy.
5. Sex: If sex with you sucks, it’s unlikely there’ll even be a 2nd date.
Meeting men online makes this easy, I can check of items 1-4 immediately and once I decide to meet them, there’s only #5 left. I usually take my time meeting someone I met online, made sure I have some kind of feel or connection with him that provides me with a comfort level I need. That doesn’t mean that things can’t go downhill very fast once I meet someone. He can be a category 3 candidate just from talking to him but as soon as I meet him, if there’s anything wrong with him, he may not even go as far as category 1.

I guess that would leave me to what I’m looking for in a man, but that again is another story.


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